This is a comment to an article that I read yesturday on http://www.wilwheaton.net on the issue of same sex marrieges.

"I'm Canadian, and I agree with you 100% and am sure my friends and family have been subjected to my opinion on this many times over. Canada has had the same issues going on for a while now. Ontario has allowed Same sex marriages, but Ralph Klein out in alberta has the same veiw as Bush. I normal have backed Ralph Klein in most of the things he has done for Alberta and have looked past his drinking problem and other such media slashing that has been done, but why is same sex marriages any of the governments concern. Yeah I respect that Bush and Klein have an opinion and that they stand by it but that they are trying to force their opinions on others is unacceptable. The thing that worries me most about it is the fact that the youth of today don't turn out for voting like they should. That the percentage is down. So the people who do vote, like our parents and grandparents are the one's who's has the higher percentage of perticipation in voting and they are the one's who will most likely have the old school views and closed minded opinions on subjects like same sex marriages."

As the Youth of Today, we need to start taking a more active roll in the decisions that are made in the world of today, for we can make a difference, we just have to be willing to make the effort. Maybe they should start setting up poll stations on the internet, I bet a lot more of the younger population would place their votes. Use our Netfile numbers for traking or something. I'm sure it could be done. If they will let us do our taxes online, why not vote?

Have you ever noticed how everyone's solution to everything that ails you is "Have you seen a Doctor?" You have a cold, go to the Doctor, you pulled a muscle, go to the doctor, I have a pimple, go to the doctor. It's crazy. So what is he going to say? "You have a cold, go home and get some rest and drink lots of fluids" I'm sorry, anyone with a brain can tell you the same thing. I don't need a phd to know what a cold is or a pulled muscle. Use some common sence people. You don't need antibiotics and drugs for everything. What you need is time and a little patients. I swear most Doctors have just gotten in the habbit of perscribing drugs just to get rid of the complainers. Pretty soon if things keep going this way, we will be dieing from the common cold. Our immune systems will have wittled down to nothing. I don't like being sick any more then anyone else but I try to give my body a chance to fight it off itself so that it can become stronger and more able to fight the next bug that comes around. I don't do "Flu shots" either. I want them to still be an option when I truelly do need them.

I wrote these words of advice to a friend of mine today

As for scaling how much one person loves as to what another person Loves.
The amount that you love him might be the max you could love anyone. where he might feel emotionally a deeper love but maybe he is more capable to feel a deeper love then you are. Everyone is on their own gradient.

Like a person who is infatuated with someone might feel such a profound and strong pull towards this person to feel that the sun rises and falls by that person, but do they really love that person or the image they have created.

Love is very complex with many, many levels.

To you, just decideing to move in with this person means a lot and is a big commitment for you, where maybe to him, he moves in with every girl he's been in a relationship with. So might mean very little. So he has to show it in another way, his own way.

The Dreaded EX's

A few months ago I came to a huge epiphany in my own life. I had recently became reacquainted with an old ex boyfriend. My first Love so to speak. Great guy, one of who I do admire, and in some small warped way will always love since he was my first. Well anyway, our relationship ended quite tragically when I caught him cheating on me. We tried to work things out (which I have sworn and have held by that swear to never do again). So we parted way as friends. This guy had some how placed me on a pedestal (yes and he still cheated). He thought my life was so perfect and that I was a dream come true so to speak and for anyone who knows me would laugh at this. Once he started to get to know me and when I let him down and he begun to realize I was just like everyone else. He no longer knew where to place me in his life. So he began to question and soon I found I went to being able to do no wrong to being able to do no right. And remember this is after we had broken up. Every mistake I made he would rub in my face, anything to make me look bad or feel bad about myself. To give the guy credit, I do not really believe he ever meant to do these things. After time went by I found myself walking on egg shells always worried about doing anything wrong, feeling our friendship was fragile and I had to keep it from breaking. Now we had a huge fight, or should I say he accused me of doing stuff I hadn't done and if I had done It would mean I was a huge bitch. I was pissed and lets say he was very mean and said things to me that he knew would hurt me the most. If he had been anywhere within a two hour drive I would have been there and clawed his eyes out to say the very least but no he did it from a distance. So we never talked for around 5 years, till one day we ran into each other and traded e-mail addresses and it wasn't till a year after that that I finally contacted him and that was after hearing he had gotten married and had straightened out his life. We e-mailed for a while till we finally decided to go for coffee with our significant others. The first words out of his mouth when we met was "I always knew you had a big mouth" For my mom is friends with his mom and I mentioned something to my mom and of course she mentioned it to his mom type thing. Anyway my heart dropped to my toes. I was horrified feeling of how I could never do anything right washed over me. Those feelings of trying to save a fragile friendship. I beat myself up about it for 3-4 days when all of a sudden I snapped! Why the hell do I care! This person is no longer part of my life, hell I don't even really know him even anymore. I was completely content the last 5-6 years without him in my life, why do I need him now. So I sent him a message telling him how his friendship isn't worth the way he makes me feel, and that I know it's not really his fault but that I don't like the person I feel like when I am around him and frankly it's not worth it! I wish his response would have been, "Sorry I didn't realize you felt that way, and I would like to see if we can change that" but no it was him saying I was being a bitch for no reason and hasn't talked to me since. That's not what I wanted, but in order for me to "clease" myself of old hurts I needed to get it out. I am OK with how things turned out and I wouldn't change anything, unless I could have helped him be more understanding. So to all you people who have ex's that have not made you feel good about yourself at some point or another. Ask yourselves, does having this person in your life really make your life better in anyway? Does keeping your hurts inside make you happier? Or would your life be a lot better with your thoughts and conscience clear and out in the open?

I have this Dilbert desktop calander, the one's that have a new joke for every day. Well the Joke for Febuary 9th said something like this: "I figured out what's wrong with life: It's other people." Now isn't that the truth. My husband says very similar everyday when he's driving. Like "Man the drive home would be pleasent if it wasn't for all these stupid people on the roads" I try to tell him that he is also one of those "Stupid people on the road" But he just can't fathum this concept. He seems to think just because He thinks he's a good driver that everyone else in the world must think so too. I happen to be one that doesn't not think he's a good driver.

Fighting normalcy
I have recently looked in on the lives of some people I used to know, people I once was inseparable from, people who were my life!! As I learn more about what they are doing in their lives makes me look at my life and how much we have grown apart. As much as I hate to admit it and despise the fact, I have become "Normal" I am married, have a dog, go to work come home to our house where we have supper and either sit and watch TV for the evening or we play on our computers. Don't get me wrong, I love my life, but there are somedays when I dream of the world I left behind. A world of no responsibilities, a life of living at the bars, watching live bands, being on the top of all the new music coming out. Like most of these bands that are out now and are the big Cats ass, are all bands that I watched at some sleazy bar like 8-10 years ago for the small price of the bar's cover charge. We were always doing crazy things. Friends were passing out drunk from their perch on a branch up in a tree, or firefighters would arrive at our weekly burnings, because someone, miles and miles away would spot the flames, or we would pack up and head south at the spur of the moment. We even had a friend sprayed with pepper spray right in the eyes once from some distraught crazy women. Those were good times. But then tragedy struck my life and things changed, people moved away, other's went berserk. I buried my head in work and walked a different path. I don't want to be "Normal" but at the same time, I'm not willing to sacrifice having my car or my house for going to see live bands and sacrificing my job to go out hiking through the mountains or white water canoeing or such things. Not willing to sacrifice my health for the desires of alcohol and pot. I am no longer young, but then I'm not old either. I sometimes wonder if I only ventured into that life to prove to my first love that he was wrong about me, when he told me that I would be happier with some yuppie with a white picket fence type life. But then again I may have embarked in my life of music and craziness because of my infatuation with a certain short dark haired "old man" that I came to think of the biggest mistake I ever made was letting him get away. I admire him still for everything he has done and accomplished. If I manage to do even a third of what he does, I will be impressed. So here I am feeling like I could be so much more then what I am. Sometimes I sit and think about all the things I want to do in my life and I feel so overwhelmed that I find myself doing absolutely nothing. I sometimes feel that it's pure laziness on my part, but sometimes I feel that it's just that I am too scared that I wont fit into that world any more, after being away for so long. I think though the thing I miss the most of that life, it the fact that I had a group of friends that were always around, seldom a day went by that I didn't see them all. We all lived within a few blocks and we all hung out and partied together. Kind of like the TV show "Friends" Well anyway that's the end of my rant for now.